This is not a poem.

Well, as of right now its the time I usually watch a movie and sometimes make notes on it. I just wanted to talk to someone but I really don't have anyone to talk to. Well, not this kind of stuff or at this time.

Its almost going to be a year since I well,well. I have been confused and unsure more than anything else. But I guess as the days go by, I'm beginning to realize fully what I want.

I still remember the time I turned 19, I was excited and bursting. I wanted to experience new things and well now I know what I really think about that,huh.

Note #1: Comfort and stagnation might seem the same when you are taking things for granted.

Turning 20 was probably a bomb blast on my nerves. Sure this year for the first time I actually had a real birthday party with a bunch of people I never in the world expected. But it put things into perspective.

Note #2: Momentariness is not always a bad thing.

This year has been like walking on fire. I'm scathing still but I'm fucking liquid gold.
I like my old self better. I think I was the smartest at 17. But you come around eventually.
I'm like version 2.0 now.
I still miss impromtu holidays and lazing around like two kul kaets.
I also learned that I am horrible at communication. I can barely use the phone and I am hopeless at corresponding on any kind of medium, except in person(then I'm like kulth).I worked at a bunch of places and fffffuuuu whoah, I'm a great worker except I have problems with authority and with the way things run :/
Yeah, ok sure.

Note #3: Suck it up, until you become Boss. It will feel good when you get paid.

I made a few decisions that I'd probably spit in my own face for if I was any less lonely and any more myself. But what with all the fucking dystopia and hospital meds, phew, it took me months to actually stop cowering like an idiot at sounds and people and their intentions.
Today I was really sad and angry and I said hey, let's see all the things I've corrected since some time and all the stuff I've fucked up and guess what for right now I actually feel calm and happy.
Also by the end of the week I buy boots to go hunt leprechauns. Also that way I get to totally check out the harley's.Whoah mama. That things got splendind curves and if you brake right enough you'll probably have a head rush and some stars in your eyes.

Note #4: Stop buying books to fill void in heart. It will never fill and all because well you;d be dead if that were true.

Ok, I don't feel like writing all that I thought I would because well I know this place has become redundent since well, again, hmm.


Ok goodbye from fidgety to you and you blog bugs.

ps: this year end, I make some total life changes :/
Next year I turn 21 so all the whole 7 years your body cell change thingy. I am going to be pumping iron and I will have stronger tooths and I will build a fucking aeroplane for the thermosphere. And I will buy a moon,ok? Look out for me?

pps: All donation accepted, please do persist inspite of odds because a good investment is a rare one.

Meow.
I should stop watching fail cat videos on youtube.